cmfireflies wrote:I don't deny that Hakan was lonely, but I really don't agree that he wanted love more than sex. Other than that, I don't think we disagree that much. I agree that Hakan refused the boys services because of the "ugliness" of the situation, but I don't that it's just a matter of aesthetics. I think Hakan was "moral" enough to be repulsed by his actions and that repulsion was stronger than his lust.
OK, I'll accept that Håkan's moral scruples would have added to his repulsion in both cases. Maybe they were the main cause, even, like (I think) you suggest. This sentence seems to point in that direction:
Förmodligen hade han dessutom skrupler, som bara den gången manifesterat sig i en intensiv avsmak för situationen.
Probably he [Håkan] additionally had scruples, which only then had manifested into an intense repulsion regarding the situation.
cmfireflies wrote:He wanted someone beautiful, pure and most important willing to satisfy his lust. But I don't think he ever sought out love, as he 1)tries to starve Eli into sexual submission ...
That Håkan tried to "starve Eli into sexual submission" is debatable.
Eli and Håkan talks with each other four times in the novel, if my counting is correct. The first time the subject is love, not sex (the 23rd of October). Håkan says that he cannot do it again, i.e. to get blood for Eli. But I see no reason to question that Håkan found killing people unbearably hard.
The second time, Håkan has returned home drunk (the 23rd of October, later). Eli has met Oskar the second time and borrowed the Rubik's cube. This time Håkan
does request sexual favours from Eli. Eli then replies: "Yes. On one condition." But Håkan rejects Eli's condition, it isn't worth the reward. To me it seems that Eli is trying to coerce Håkan into doing something that is objectionable, rather than the other way around.
The third time (the 24th of October) Eli has washed, which had not happened before. He tries again to persuade Håkan to get blood for him, but Håkan says no. However, Håkan does offer his own blood to Eli, without any conditions. For some untold reason Eli rejects the offer, and instead decides to "go himself", apparently aiming for Oskar. But Oskar saves himself, and Eli instead uses deception to get close enough to Jocke.
(I have re-read this passage, and it seems that Eli initially wasn't very strong, and thus told the truth to Håkan. However, when Jocke after a few seconds finally realised what was happening, Eli had already drunk enough of Jocke's blood to become too strong for Jocke to get rid of.)
The fourth time (the 29th of October) Eli and Oskar had been meeting every night, and Håkan had heard them laughing outside. Håkan was sitting on the floor outside the bathroom when Eli exits, and Håkan offers to go for blood one more time, in return for a night with Eli. This is the first (and only) time Håkan requests sexual favours in return for getting blood, but by this time Eli had already proven that he was capable to do it himself. Therefore, I don't think Håkan trying to "starve Eli into sexual submission" fits the situation. Instead he was bargaining,
your services in return for mine, but this was only what Eli had initially suggested. Still, Håkan wasn't certain that he would get what he was asking for:
"One night. I want one night."
"Yes."
"Can I have that?"
"Yes."
"Lay beside you? Touch you?"
It doesn't seem Håkan has very much to bargain with here. Eli clearly is in control. What could be held against Håkan is that he had begun to realise that Eli was actually what he looked to be, a child, and therefore might want to lay in bed with Håkan just as much as any child would do. But Eli was also a vampire, not the usual child. He could say no, and he did, when Håkan tried to extend what Eli already had accepted.
cmfireflies wrote:... and 2) just was generally uninterested in Eli as a person. He didn't really know the second thing about Eli, it seemed in the book that their argument over his screwup was one of the longer conversations they ever had. I think Hakan had a fantasy about love with Eli and was perfectly content with that and was quite annoyed when Eli started showing her true self. I think that Hakan used his idea of love to ease his self-loathing, definitely second to satisfying his lust. There's no hint that he tried to have a personal connection with Eli.
In the book Håkan didn't screw up in the sense that he returned home without the goods. Eli got the blood he needed thrice. Håkan's mistakes were that he left traces.
All this said, I agree that Håkan's love towards Eli was delusional, and but I'm less convinced that Håkan did not take an interest in Eli's person. He had the idea that Eli was an old person in a child's body, and I think that Eli had let him into that conclusion on purpose. Additionally, Eli didn't behave very childlike initially, so that Håkan was mistaken isn't necessarily a sign that he wasn't interested.
But I think that Håkan
wanted to love Eli, and that he tried quite hard to be what was his idea of a loving and caring person. That he didn't love Eli the way he should might be because he didn't know how to love at all. I think Håkan had not been loved by anyone for a very long time, if ever.