Girls as bullies

[Wolfchild]

When you talk about girls bullying other girls, rape is pretty much a non sequitur. Their has already been a term coined to cover the tactics of female bullies, and that term is Relational Aggression. Some people want to link relational aggression to the rise of the internet, but as with everything else, the internet doesn't bring any new tricks to the party. It's just another channel for all of the same old ways for people to be cruel to each other.

When I first heard the term "relational aggression", I thought, "Great. Another psychobabble term that people are going to use to sell self-help books with for the next 18 months or so." However, as I learned what the term described, I found that it was a useful term to describe a whole collection of behaviors that I have seen many times.

As bullying, relational aggression is sort of invisible. You don't really "see" it happening, like we saw bullying happen to Oskar. You don't see girls flicking each other's noses or putting each other's clothes in the toilet. Instead you have to watch very closely to pick up the ostracism, the exclusion, etc. It's more subtle than what Oskar was subjected to, but just as painful and equally destructive.

What I recall in Little Star was a combination of relational aggression and just classic bullying. I think that JAL really doesn't have a good feel for relational aggression, and I also think that's a good thing. Otherwise Little Star could have been horrifying beyond endurance.

[gattoparde59]

When you talk about girls bullying other girls, rape is pretty much a non sequitur.

Maybe that was derailing the thread, but I became intrigued with the idea that rape is a form of bullying. Beside, girls raping girls with broom handles etc. is not unheard of.

As far as relational aggression goes, the research seems to emphasize that these behaviors are not exclusive to one sex or the other. It tends to be girls or boys doing certain things.

You can go and read books and articles on the subject, which is what Johnajvide said he did, since his experience comes from a male perspective and he wanted this story to be about girls.

This subject also reveals something about the gender divide as far as the "manipulative" Eli is concerned. It is easier perhaps for women to imagine Eli being manipulative than it is for men?

[Wolfchild]

This subject also reveals something about the gender divide as far as the "manipulative" Eli is concerned. It is easier perhaps for women to imagine Eli being manipulative than it is for men?

I think that maybe it's not that women would pick up on how Eli could be manipulative so much as women know how easy it is to manipulate men.

Funny, but perhaps also a grain of truth there. Perhaps on some level, some women look at Oskar and think, "How could Eli not manipulate him?" As with so many aspects of that story, people project themselves into the gaps.

In this story, its a much more open question whether Theres was manipulating Teresa, but certainly no one else was. That kind of cruelty was not really visited upon Teresa.