A thousand thanks for the astute observations!
Actively referring to interested parties pursuing Eli and Oskar as 'Javerts' is a bit on the nose, and perhaps a bit misleading regarding the children's level of innocence. But Avila and Grigor are pretty much 100% on the kids' side, so this attitude fits. Plus, the use of the term got a chuckle from me, so I'd say that made it worthwhile. Also when I suspend my disbelief the strategy and brainstorming sessions those two have are legitimately engaging and feel credible. It's almost like I'm stepping out of LtROI to briefly partake of a spy or crime novel.
I really enjoyed trying out genres other than horror/romance. I have police procedurals in part 2 and 9, a bit of cloak-and-dagger stuff in part 4 and in the black market ideas in part 10, and actual horror/suspense in part 5. Much fun, but with varying degrees of success.
Whenever I could get the kids into choreographed action, such as the muggers in part 7 and the Wile E. Coyote bit in part 10 (Acme Shipping), I felt like the writing flowed.
Eli's pleasure at being schooled is endearing, and also rather promising for her and Oskar's prospects in the future. I have to wonder just how much they are actually capable of learning, though, being 'frozen' as they are. Clearly they can form new memories and take on new information, but can their education entirely stick? Especially post-hibernation. After all, Eli only just recalled that Malmö was where she met the 'hollow woman'.
Jameron also raised the question about the implication of frozen at 12. In fact, they can learn and retain new information as well as any 12-year-old. Eli's seeming lack of personal history is because vast stretches of her life were just the same stuff/different day. At her and Oskar's age, they have logic, but as applied to concrete situations; they are not wired for abstract thinking (high school age); and they are not wired for thinking things through (college age). These features depend on adding new brain cells (up to about age 18 to 25), but learning as such just requires billions of new connections between what brain cells the kids had when they were turned. But Malmö she remembered -- just not the name! The name wouldn't have been important to her, but she knew the buildings, the harbor, the alleys, and the kinds of ships from a hundred years ago.
Oh, and as much as I could, I left out anything in the novel that wasn't in the film--bathtub of blood, hibernating/estivating. I also modified stuff just because I wanted to -- Eli is less savvy in my story, acts younger, and is shorter than Oskar by a few inches more than in the film. I like the novel just fine, but, as I understand myself, I mostly wrote the story so I could hang out with young Lina and Kåre.
I know that a number of the infected see LTROI as a "seamless whole," but I see each version -- book, two films, and Jack Thorne's script for the stage -- as standalone works of creativity. I took what I wanted to from the novel -- her age, for example -- but most of the stuff not in the film I took from fan fictions. (I can't wait to loot your thrilling story
I leaned heavily on stories by a-contemplative-life, PeteMork, Gkmoberg1, and lombano, even when they conflicted with the canon.
I hope you find part 5 engaging. It was my favorite of the 10 parts to write!
P.S.: In an earlier note, you mentioned the alley scene in Vällingby. I don't think of the unfortunate teens as perverts, just working-class kids who live in a world of rampant sexuality (including bold, pre-teen exploration/exploitation), much like the world I grew up in.