a_contemplative_life wrote:This nicely captured some of the pathos of Eli's character. I especially enjoyed:
How can it be that Oskar can make me feel so good and so bad, sometimes at the same time? How is it he can make me feel so safe and so scared at the same time?* * *
Now, I'm going to lose Oskar. Not just a friend. Oskar. I'm going to lose being with somebody who makes me feel things I don't remember ever feeling before. I'm losing the friend who can make me laugh. I'm going to lose being able to forget about being me for hours and hours and hours at a time.
I'm going to lose me. * * *
. . .
Oskar... can't you smile, not even a little? Can't you find some way to let me know it's going to be OK, that you don't hate me? Can't you even stand to look at me anymore?
Oskar... just... look at me? Please?I would love to see what you think was going through her mind at the moment she decided to kiss Oskar after Lacke's death.

Contemplative, the POV I perceive in your writings may have had something of a corrupting influence. This is not a bad thing! - this whole forum has given me perspectives on things I'd have never even glimpsed if I'd never thought to look for help on the IMDB boards in which *somebody* invited me HERE. Frankly, if I'd been stuck with the IMDB boards, I'd still be muddling with much more primitive and harebrained appreciation.
If you like it so damn much, I'm pleased. Seriously.
As for what might have been going on in Eli's mind in the interpretation I've been sharing, now that you request it, I'll give it a go. It's either that, or start considering sharing a far darker interpretation the movie makes possible (even if unlikely).
I think I've mentioned elsewhere I almost never write fiction. I've even admitted to having the kind of background that almost mitigates intractably
against writing fiction; imagination in matters such as these is alien. These monologues I've been writing are simply my own attempt at understanding what it is I find so compelling about this movie, and about Eli, observing a very simple missive: always write what you know, never what you don't.
This is the game "Speak for X", for which X has primarily been Eli so far. One of the major parameters for this game is to avoid injection (or is "projection" the word I really want?) as much as possible, but given the nature of the subject and the context within we find it, some degree of this forbidden element is unavoidable.
Another parameter to which I've been trying to bind is to avoid cloying fawning romanticised worship, and I've been trying
not to assume anybody knows who the characters are or has any particular feelings for them. Granted, the knowledge that Eli is a vampire is assumed, but apart from this, have I succeeded?
As for The Kiss, well... that one may be just a tad more complex. Eli's move away from a twilit emotionally half dead existence as as well advanced as we see in the movie, and blood in this scene is a final challenge to Oskar's tolerance for difference she
has to pose before trusting him completely. As usual, I'll have to pick my way through it one step at a time and just see where it goes.
What do you think - should I finish the confrontation scene, the half that occurs AFTER her having apparently showered, or would you rather I tackle Lacke's murder? I'm finding I have to write these things as time and inclination permit; the fact that I have something bouncing around in my head doesn't necessarily mean I'll have the ability to push it into a word processor. Something within has to whisper "Bon ben, mon vieux, c'est l'heure... "