The Eli Chronicles

[Clubmeister]

What a dramatic chapter!

This moment:
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..I can’t save her! I’ve failed her! But I can’t… With a herculean effort, he raised himself up, trembling, on his hands and knees, then reached blindly for her one last time. I can’t save her! I’ve failed her! But I can’t… With a herculean effort, he raised himself up, trembling, on his hands and knees, then reached blindly for her one last time...
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I almost cried...

I must confess, last chapters are full of the sophisticated shades of narrative, so I feel sometimes lack of English knowledges (not always copypast to Google translator gives the correct translation).

And while reading this moment,
...For someone so very clever, how could you be so stupid? Didn’t you know he would spend the rest of his miserable, eternal life looking for you?...

I was absolutely horrified by these possible consequences. And I especially glad that everything ended happily.
I know for sure: with Eli they will never get bored.
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By the way, "The Eli Chronicles" are in first place by views in our FF. Congratulations, Pete

[PeteMork]

I must confess, last chapters are full of the sophisticated shades of narrative, so I feel sometimes lack of English knowledges (not always copypast to Google translator gives the correct translation).

And while reading this moment,
...For someone so very clever, how could you be so stupid? Didn’t you know he would spend the rest of his miserable, eternal life looking for you?...

I was absolutely horrified by these possible consequences. And I especially glad that everything ended happily.
I know for sure: with Eli they will never get bored.
--------
By the way, "The Eli Chronicles" are in first place by views in our FF. Congratulations, Pete

Thanks! By the way, if there's any part of this you're having trouble translating, send me a PM or post it here, and I'll try to make it clearer.

[PeteMork]

Truth is often stranger than fiction, as we all have heard.
(But, in this case, quite relevant with respect to 'The Eli Chronicles')

Although quite sad for poor Brooke, I found this article to be quite intriguing; especially the ramifications on the second page. (This has been a recurring news story in the U.S., but this article seems to sum it up a bit better than others.)

Brooke the Immortal. An American Child May Hold Secrets to Aging

http://www.spiegel.de/international/zei ... 25798.html

[Clubmeister]

It reminds me the prof. Dawson researches
Personally for me very attractive this case:
Nicky Freeman, a 40-year-man who seems to be trapped in a boy's body, lives in Esperance in Western Australia. His biological age is estimated at 10 years
I'd like to be like him. Maybe just a little older, about 11-12 y.o.

[PeteMork]

Chapter 56: Eli’s Karma

Link: http://let-the-right-one-in.com/fancont ... %99s-karma

Eli makes some decisions, and Sava solves a mystery.

[BellKatHerm]

I don't know. I feel like in your author notes you are trying to sidestep the improbability of your task, rather than face it head-on. Can you have your cake and eat it, too? If you are going OOC, then own it. It seems like you are trying to go OOC without being held responsible for it. Like you want your reader to treat your story as in-character (loyal to JAL and movie) even though it is not. But why should reader grant this, just bc you ask for it? At the very least, the reader should not grant it simply bc you ask for it. If your story does not match LTROI world and ending, well that is hardly original to world of fanfiction. But to ask reader to pretend that it does - that is another matter. "I'm going out of character, but treat me with the same seriousness as authors that don't go OOC." Why should reader do this? How have you earned this?

[PeteMork]

I don't know. I feel like in your author notes you are trying to sidestep the improbability of your task, rather than face it head-on. Can you have your cake and eat it, too? If you are going OOC, then own it. It seems like you are trying to go OOC without being held responsible for it. Like you want your reader to treat your story as in-character (loyal to JAL and movie) even though it is not. But why should reader grant this, just bc you ask for it? At the very least, the reader should not grant it simply bc you ask for it. If your story does not match LTROI world and ending, well that is hardly original to world of fanfiction. But to ask reader to pretend that it does - that is another matter. "I'm going out of character, but treat me with the same seriousness as authors that don't go OOC." Why should reader do this? How have you earned this?

First, I want to welcome you to the forum, BellKatHerm. I see that this is your first post.

As to your comments, could you be more specific? I’m not sure if you are concerned that I have taken the characters too far astray, or that somewhere I’ve claimed that I haven’t. Or both.

If you could point to specific parts of the trilogy and commentary that illustrate your points, I would be happy to discuss them with you. However, I assure you; my intention has never been to present my writing as something it is not. I consider myself a rank amateur compared to JAL, and indeed compared to many other FF writers on this very forum. The only area in which I excel is in sheer volume.

I’m looking forward to discussing this further with you.

[Clubmeister]

I don't know. I feel like in your author notes you are trying to sidestep the improbability of your task, rather than face it head-on. Can you have your cake and eat it, too? If you are going OOC, then own it. It seems like you are trying to go OOC without being held responsible for it. Like you want your reader to treat your story as in-character (loyal to JAL and movie) even though it is not. But why should reader grant this, just bc you ask for it? At the very least, the reader should not grant it simply bc you ask for it. If your story does not match LTROI world and ending, well that is hardly original to world of fanfiction. But to ask reader to pretend that it does - that is another matter. "I'm going out of character, but treat me with the same seriousness as authors that don't go OOC." Why should reader do this? How have you earned this?

I think, BellKatHerm, you should write first something more perfect than Pete's trilogy, so that we could compare.
And only then you may try to criticize this way.

[BellKatHerm]

I appreciate the input. Work just went all crappy, so I don't know when I'll be able to do justice to your comments. But I do appreciate your writing, know that. I can't imagine the world without JAL and his work, and I'm glad you seem to feel the same way.

[mackousko]

BellKatHerm I think you take it too seriously.